Vague ramblings

Ho! Ho! Ho? Heil! Heil! Heil! more like

Posted in Various meats by Ian Cundell on 20 December, 2013

Christmas approaches – indeed it starts earlier every year, such that before long we will face a year long Yule rule. And rule is the operative word, for we are held in thrall by a conspiracy of silence. The filthy truth about Santa Claus is hidden under a veneer of jollity but now it is time to expose the scandal: Santa is a fascist and has even tricked us into celebrating the fact. The evidence is damning.

It is hidden in the words of an ostensibly jolly song celebrating the imminent arrival of Santa, but make no bones about it, Santa Claus is Coming to Town is Santa’s Fascist manifesto, with codas designed to appeal to the most depraved in our society. Let’s look at the evidence.

You better watch out

Shameless, isn’t it?

You better not cry

The traditional appeal to Fascist ideas of strength is nailed early

Better not pout

Dissent is to be crushed

I’m telling you why

What happens to the Christmas message? No hint that we are in this together. I am telling you the score

Santa Claus is coming to town

Be afraid!

He’s making a list

His secret police is on the case…

And checking it twice;

…with traditional Fascist thoroughness

Gonna find out Who’s naughty and nice

In order to judge you

Santa Claus is coming to town

To rule you

He sees you when you’re sleeping

See how the Fascists appeal to the most base elements of our society? When are our children most vulnerable? Yes! When they sleep.

He knows when you’re awake

But even if you are alert, the Fascists know where you live!

He knows if you’ve been bad or good

Yeah! And we know what their idea of ‘good’ is don’t we? Put it this way, it will involve a white Christmas.

So be good for goodness sake!

Conform! Fit in! Be afraid to be different! March to the beat of the Fascist orthodoxy…

O! You better watch out!
You better not cry
Better not pout
I’m telling you why

The rhetoric is endless!

Santa Claus is coming to town

To control you

Santa Claus is coming to town

To crush you under foot. Forever.

Now click here to learn the real reason Bruce Springsteen is called “The Boss”.


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